It is really tiring to run along for some cause that was supposed to be a common thing all alone. Well almost. Each time when something needs to be settled, it almost practically falls on my hands. Not that it totally isn't my responsibility, but it would be nice if we all shared the burden sometimes. It both worries and scares me how people can give you an immediate answer to a request. It almost sounds like I walked right into a shut door. I will really appreciate if sometimes others just show some support or at least some appreciation of what you have done. I'm covering so much for others until I feel as tho I'm taken for a free ride. Esp on my PMSsy days and I don't feel gd abt much things.

I can't possibly cover each and everything everytime for you guys. By right, I should be just going there to give you support. You guys are still the real ones who should be providing the voice for the mass. I definitely won't hesitate in helping you guys. You know better than anyone how I've been helping out. I'm not sure if I'm not firm enough in my stance, and I might not be assertive enough. But yah, I can't possibly keep giving people my time. It's taking a toll on my personal time too.

Too much of grousinga and complaining makes me feel tired. Tomorrow's a better new day.

Thanks Lydia for your lovely vcds! Edison Chen will definitely make my day. Not some dunno what kiddo you told me from dunno what Taiwanese band. Edison still wins hands down. Tsk..

i'm really supposed to be studing right now. such an ill-disciplined creature. ought to be shot dead. haha.. my running session failed yest. i was too lazy to move when i got home. so wen, even when i finished i still didn't run. boo hoo hoo.. i'm just a bag of lazy bones.

shucks, the hols seem to be ending and i've yet done anything contructive. just idling during the day, watching tv and finally turning in early for the night. grr, i haven't done anyth. i hate the thought of sch starting again.

my ns friend told me it's good to study. there's a sense of purpose. maybe lah, but it's absolutely hectic! guess girls haven't got tt 2yr break from studyin like the guys. we're on different frequencies when it comes to being excited abt studying. haha gabe, you might be one of those enthu ppl waiting to charge into smu eh?

for now, I HATE SCHOOL!!!

really enjoyed hanging out with the ruggrats as usual. it was great. not tt we had much excitement, but the chat was just nice. it's always so nice to catch up with the gang, altho we seem to keep having prata each time. tt's not too good, cuz it's fattening. haha

wensi amazes me by how well she understands me sometimes. what she says just wack right into my face. or maybe it's just tt i'm an easy person to read. anyway, she suggested tt i play with lion reds for the fun of it. i don't know whether i really should. i'm kind of used to my life now tt's not dictated by my trg sessions and stuff. but part of me longs to play rugby. guess i suck at it now. there's another part tt tells me not to play cuz there's my stupid little pride at stake. cuz the rugby circle's so small, the fact tt you're lousy shows. i don't know, maybe someone or sth will come inspire me to play again. one thing i'm quite sure of is tt i won't be playing for NTU, provided some miracle or spark of enlightenment strikes me. then again, the new blood is so fast i won't be able to catch up. haha slow poke bike..

playing rugby in nj was the highlight of my sports life. it was both fun and i indulged in the love n closeness we had as a team. it was really a team. a far cry from what you see in NTU. when i played last yr, i just didn't feel tt i really belonged to the team and it totally killed me love for the game (at least when i played with them) if you ask me what exactly i don't like abt NTU rugby, i can't really pin down the exact reason. no team bonding, pride, my lousiness, the lack of an inspiring coach? one thing for sure is tt i'll love my ruggrats forever. everyone, shaqi, raisin, musketeers, chock, mighty mouse, lobster, the speedsters: auntie jac & yam yam.. this is disgusting to say but i even respect our foul-mouthed and bad reputation coach rong (beefcake as lobster and i call him)

mighty mouse had to remind me abt my game last time yesterday during dinner. no idea why they said i cld be the game maker at my side of the field. i don't even see myself doing lots. guess i worked well with yam as the left wing. i'll always respect coach for what he told me. nothing really big but it was the start of how i picked up the game and eventually made it into the team. used to just be tt teamB player. yeah, beefcake's a good coach even tho there are moments we really hate him and his 'golden' finger. slap me or what if you're one of the anti-rong jingxings, but i respect him as a coach. he really teaches a different type of ball game. hmm, maybe if i go to lion reds and train under ann & karen (the wedded lesbian couple. eks) i might change my mind and include ann in my respected coach list. we'll see.

yesterday's worship was good. teck wee's good at leading the congregation as usual. yeah, it's time we had this kinda worship both in main congre and yz. hmm, wonder when we're going NCC with amy and pkg. shld be soon i guess.

went to watch white noise with vane, suyu and chor ing. some kinda mini farewell for chor ing who's going back to melbourne this wed. lucky girl who's perpetually travelling. anyway the show was dumb. it wasn't scary just those sudden noises and screams. hahha vanessa tugged my sleeve and we both screamed. gosh, we were the only 2 idiots who screamed in the whole cinema. hahha.. then chor ing's scaring herself while suyu's laughing her way off thruout the show. dn advise ppl to watch. quite boring and no big climax in the storyline. bleah.

had a nice chat with chor ing abt YAM while we were out yest. hmm, i'm looking forward to having YAM. wonder how it's like. but at least it's going to be a gd grp tt caters to our age ppl. hahha.. let's pray hard abt YAM. it's time we had a grp like this. maybe not as well estab like PUNJ, but it's gd enuff to have a gathering with ppl your age. i feel kinda old with the sec kids. altho sometimes i blend in with my height. ops!

when anyone mentions the word chef, you think of that italiano who has a long and carefully-twisted moustache with a big belly and long white paper cap. with the finger lickin sign saying
"mmmm! fantastic!"

wait a min. there's been this attack of the dishy chefs aka naked chef jamie oliver and the italian guy on ch5. boy, they look more like lads in a boy band or some italian soccer team, not even chefs. probably the customer who's sitting at tt little table with a pretty lady over some romantic dinner for two. who ever thought that chefs would be so cool?

suddenly it seems that chefs are more like the dish instead of that french dessert. haha desperate housewives suddenly taking cooking classes. gosh, it's the invasion of the lookers instead of the cooks-to-be. the cook shows we see are more like lifestyle pages, chances for you to oogle at the trendy and suave chefs. no more aunty aka fang tai type of cook lessons on tv. gone are those ugly cook shows with the recepies and ingredients list plaguing the tv. sad story for those who really wanna learn how to cook.

whatever the case, i don't mind watching these shows. i absolutely can't cook, but my pride tells me yeah i can 'learn' along the way while watching these shows. hmmm tastes so good. haha.. jamie oliver's taken (he's gotta cook for his little girl now. bah) so i don't mind taking an italian dish

happy lunar new year!!! dong dong dong qiang... gong hei fat choi! hahha my overused cantonese phrase when i see old cantonese ppl. tt's all i can really say.

i'm glad to announce tt i'm well! yipee.. hahha so i ate quite a bit at everyone's house yest. but had to control until the last few places. sheesh.. yeah, ah xian's also done with her chicky pox to be able to go out!

my neighbour's so funny. we had reunion dinner together. so the older guys drank. and he was so silly to join everyone else to drink. then had rashes. haha duh.. my little cousin was so cute too. all dressed in her china girl dress, then playing with guns with the boys. hahha, so weird. but i guess the girls in my hse are all like this. too many male cousins, you just play along with em.

i'm just gonna enjoy the holidays. can't really bring myself to spoil the festive mood with so much sch work. eeks...

so anyway, happy new year to everyone! xing xiang shi chen, feng sheng shui qi. wow, i'm impressed by my knowledge of cheng yus. thanks to my cousins lynn n joey, never fail to come up with new cheng yus when greeting everyone. ok here goes my last one: zhu dai ga, LONG MA JING SHEN!

the weekend has just been a time to soak up the cny atmosphere. i totally didn't do anyth over the wkend. i watched all tt tv cld offer on fri, and sat was just a whole day out. sunday was slacking and i only panicked at nite.

gosh, chinatown is jam packed! i only went frm 2-6 and it was already so packed. oh man, i've never been to chinatown so close to cny. eeks! people squeezing with people. but for the atmosphere, it's much better than my miserable little town central. after chinatown, sent my granny and grand aunt home, and popped by toa payoh central. oh gosh, it was equally packed w ppl at the pasar malam. enuff people watching for the day.

the greedy me ate so much of the goodies at home, i've got a terrible sorethroat now. bummer. drinking some brown thing my grandpa gave me. it tastes weird. ah, i never can control those little prawn rolls. my retribution for finishing almost half of whatever prawn rolls we have at home. i live in regrets now..

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man, mac@orchard HASN'T CALLED ME! hrmph, i called and they said the shipment's delayed cuz they expect it to also come, but hasn't arrived. oh man gabe, ahhh! you saw it at the shops!! man, so i'm just eagerly waiting for that 'miracle' call to collect my i-shuffle! sound so much like a brat, a kid waiting in anticipation to blow out that birthday candle. my patience is growing thinner each day. and my bro keeps saying i got cheated. how can mac cheat me rite? it's their company! silly chris.

yipee! it's so much closer to the cny holidays! woohoo! hahha, it's so great knowing that for next wk i'm only studying in sch for 2.5hrs. hahha, i guess it's is the most slack week of my sch life.

somehow i hated cny last yr, but this is different. i'm kinda looking forward to it. sheesh, maybe i'm secretly hoping dad will let me drive a bit. oh but it's kinda scary, we might just step onto each others nerves over driving during the festive season. hmm, maybe i'll tag along with my cousin. hopefully he has his friend's car this new yr again. haha..

poor couz, he's gotta go thailand for army trg on 2nd day of new yr. bummer.. oh well, he's a regular, so he's paid for this anyway. can't imagine he actually signed on with the army. hahha he used to be tt kid who taught me each street fighter characters' super powers, played ninja tutles with me and cried for his transformer toy. hahah the red indian for all the mischief we got into, including getting ourselves lost in the old plaza sing. hahah... dumb things we did when we were young.

ok couz, all the best for your trg!