Bt Batok Pres Youth Fellowship joined us at Youth Zone today. Kinda cool to see all youths to congregate and gather to worship in one spirit. Really. Something new that we've explored. Kudos to the ppl who organized it. Although it makes me feel kind of older than all of them, it was good to see all their faces brighten up during worship. A blast. Maybe too much of a blast that some older folks in church might not take it. Haha...

Reminds me of how powerful it is when God's people come to worship together, regardless of where we come from. Just like how it was at the youth congregation at Chiang Rai. God's presence was really felt over at Chiang Rai. Guess that was why I teared even though I didn't understand a single thing they were saying. The power of God's spirit moving among the people!

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What makes this day especially interesting is how I managed to park with a car beside me! Haha, quite a venture for me considering how a terrible 'parker' I am. Best of all, I could do it in one move and get the whole vehicle within the lot! Hahaha... interesting. But it isn't perfect lah. Not exactly in the middle of the lot, but I'm so darn pleased. A step forward for this lousy driver. I'll try again tmr - last day before Dad returns and uses the vehicle.

Hahhaa, presentations are finally over. That's a whole load off my back. Think we all looked so smart today. Wonder when I'll get the photo. Anyway it seems that everytime there's a presentation, there'll definitely be some photo taking session. Haha same went for the girls, with chock wen and li, also with chunli and gang. Worst one was Yr1 Mktg project. Literally spent like an hr before presentation fooling around with the camera. Hahaha...

everyone shld just listen to john mayer and herbie hancook's stiched up! totally awesome. 100 marks for chill out factor!

anyway i think i really saw ah lian's buddy ilynn in school today. chock saw too. she says can't be her. but how can it be? it really is her?! oh well, nothing shocking why we see ppl in sch. ntu's a public area anyway. wonder how is ah lian....

Oh man, that was just the final episode of the Jap show Pride. There goes my weekly dose of Jap craze and drooling over Takuya Kimura. Guess that is one of the few people whom I really think possess real charisma. Too bad, tt's all in Japan. None here that's of equivalent kinda charisma. Hahha..!

It's also not just the cute factor that makes this show so intriguing. There's always the game itself that really draws people. Reminds me of what kind of adrenaline rush I always had during touch games. It was what really drove me to push all limits. The kind of team spirit was wonderful. How we were (and still are) so close. Brings back those memories where I would be on a high during training and competition. Picturing in my mind all those game plans and strategy. Listening to rock and psyching myself up for any competition. Don't ever think those people who scream and shout during a match are just headless chickens making much noise, it really brings out a different person on the field. It really works.

Although I really don't play any more sports, no more touch or tennis, I still yearn for that kind of rush - where you really play your guts out as a team, pushing each other on and enjoying each other's victories and misses. The feel of breaking through the defense, the feel of passing off for your mate to finish off beautifully, the feel of making a touchdown. I really miss that part of my life back in JC days. It'll never be replicated with any other team, other than the girls whom sweat it all out with me during those punishing nites doing PT. Every scene of the games we played keeps replaying in my mind. How we smiled with faces full of pespiration, the determined look when we had to endure all the mad cap running like guys.

Sometimes, I wished that I didn't stop playing touch. Miss game, miss the spirit of touch. Doubt that I would ever get that in NTU, cause I really just miss playing with the rugrats. It's a whole different ball game playing and getting used to other's playing styles.

Maybe I'll indulge myself in more movies like the Titans or more Takuya Kimura. Sink myself into delusion. What the heck am I talking abt.. Aftermath of watching and gluing myself to Halu 9. Too bad my favourite jersey number isn't 9.

Hooray! I got the confirmation from Ernst & Young yesterday! Sheesh, I was so paranoid that I thought the partner who confirmed the selection with me during interview was patronizing me. How comforting it is to hear the confirmation again from their HR. Kind of looking forward to attachment after a very dry period of uni work. It's totally stale and brain-numbing.

Checked Studentlink and realized that Ritz Carlton had released their shortlisted candidates. A little disppointed that I didn't get a call from them cuz I was also secretly hoping that I would be given a chance, even tho a thousand and one applied. Maybe I shld've just applied for Toyota.. Haha might just get a discount to buy a car. Yah rite, like I can even afford it if they give me half price.

All this craze about planning your career has been kinda scary. Was just talking to QL in the car yesterday. Guess I'm not the only one who doesn't know what I want in future. Hmm, ok maybe I know what I want. Just that it's impractical to choose to backpack and travel the world as my life ambition. My parents will just kill me for using up all their money and not support the family. Haha..

Is planning really gonna be fruitful? Think it only reassures people of their future; telling them that they did make an effort to do something about it. But hey, doesn't it really take divine intervention in reality? We can plan all we want, but there's ain't any guarantee. I'll just take one step at a time. Do what is laid before me well and let the results be in His hands. Safer option too. Just get a job and be done with it. Dn bother going all out to climb some flimsy corporate ladder. Too many spikes along the ladder. It's sad to bleed to death that way.

Parable of the Talents - message for YZ yesterday.

Guess it's really speaking to me since the girls mentioned that I really outta use my abilities to serve in different aspects. Well, one of the lessons what that if we don't use our talents, God can just take them away.

Anyway the girls are so amazing. They're such a lovely bunch of girls. Wanted to make noise at them for not doing their bs etc. Guess only Rach knew that I wanted to make noise. But after their mini-advice session for me, my nagging has sorta disappeared. Very encouraged by each and everyone of them because I've been learning and seeing things happening in their lives; how they've grown closer as a group. Yeah, Hebrews 10:34-35 really works!

See my beauties on Sat for bs again! :)

It just so strange how some team dynamics just don't work out. After so many good project teams, I really feel so strange in one that still hasn't got over the norming stage. Can't imagine we're still wondering and figuring out how to do stuff after so many meet ups. Grr... I'd rather have a team that has gotten past trying to figure out each other's work habits. Sign of impatience now.

so thrilled that i managed to tap on someone's wireless network just in my room! not exactly that fast, but it's considerable. at least i manage to come online. no more fussing with my bros over the computer. and i get to do things in my own room. thank God for wireless network subscribers who don't lock their networks with passwords. hahah... it pays to share (excuse the pun here. it ain't intentional)

my new haircut's so nerdy. sheesh. like some geek. but then again, it's just kinda like my jc cut. all cropped and fuss free - albeit it's less funky now cuz i don't think i can manage trying to spruce it up everyday. oh well, i'll just pretend that i'm some freshie in sch. hahhaa...

::

applying for PA is exciting yet tedious. all those admin stuff to take care of and writing to be done. grr.. and my whole resume looks pathetic. i even had to copy other ppl's cover letter for my own. poor thing. kind of excitied as well cuz this time it's really working in some bigger co (provided i get either of my choice) rather than some industrial area again. was kind of tempted to go for makino which is nearer. but ok lah, i'll just cross my fingers and pray that God gives me either choice

a new blog skin that is totally geometric and interesting. in a stage of evolution and change. can't stick to same old stuff. darn boring.

oh well, i'm also getting sick of blogging. no patience to sit down n tell the whole world what's happening to me. besides, it's much nicer to tell my lovely friends than having them read it off some public thing.

what the heck, i'm rambling again. anyway sch is boring except for 311 tutorials. hahha.. oh well, just being really childish and silly over it. but yah, much more interesting horizons than usual boring souls in other classes. just for viewing pleasure.

Haven't been posting much on the blog. Oh well, I'm just not so dedicated to sitting down and jotting down my whole life out. Maybe I'll change my blogskin for the new sem. For the record, this sem is so boring. Think it just gets worse. Ahhh...... Quick, lemme go to Europe now!

Finally got my thailand photos, but I wonder if I'm going to even post them up. It takes so much effort. I'll just print em in hardcopy and share it around when someday I do look at Rou & Qinlei's exchange photos.

Drats, I need a bath. Didn't run and I just slept the whole afternoon. I'm such a sleuth. Gross.

Retreat was good. Never thought it would work out. All the quite moments spent reading Scriptures and praying. Haha, well I'm always a pessimist and a person of little faith. So once again, God has demonstrated that I better not underestimate Him, and that I ought to have more faith. Yeah, it was great that everyone had a time to get away from the buzz of everday life to reflect and listen to God. Yah, no words can sorta describe what we did or learnt, but it was spiritually upliting.

:::::

Went for 2 funerals in 2wks. Kinda scary how what Rou said is true, when you are in your twenties, it's more likely that we attend more funerals. Just this morning, got another msg from Kien Seng that Yi En & Yi Ling's grandma passed away in Hong Kong. Thank goodness Aunty Grace is already there to meet her mom with Yi Jing. Wonder whether Pastor Cheng Huat will bring the kids over for the funeral. And to think that I just heard him conduct Yee Lin's grandma's funeral yesterday.

Just as I was sitting there looking at the coffin, it just made me wonder how foolish some people are during their lives. It's pointless really using your whole life just to pursue things that you can't bring with you at the end. Death is what equalizes all men-rich and poor, all are alike upon death. You just lie there. And you really take comfort and joy that even though you're relegated to lying motionless here on earth, there's another new journey in heaven.

This whole spate of NKF news is really stirring lotsa emotions among S'poreans. Well I guess, it's sth we all expected and knew deep in our hearts, but it just never came into light officially. Kinda sad how people can start out with a sole goal of wanting to help people, purely humanitarian and altruistic, but being swayed by other agendas along the way.

Kind of disgusting also how the money has been squandered to provide for someone's excessive comfort while others are struggling with the little savings they have just to stay alive.

How could NKF have gotten by without being transparent for so many yrs? Political power behind their backs? Oh well, we never know unless we're part of the board.

Guess now they really really need to restore tt reputation. A terribly difficult position for the new executive and board. God bless them in their pursuit man.

Anyway those vandalizers are really stupid. Why use such lowly way of getting back at the org? Not only doesn't prove your point, it also gets them (or tt person) into trouble. Hahah, but funny thing is they can actually converse in 3 languages. I was pretty tickled by tt.

Whatever comes of this whole saga, I think no one shld stray from the main goal of helping people. Not just through NKF, but also remember the many more VWOs around. Be happy that we are still healthy and kicking. Who knows, someday we might just be those needing help.

Beauty often comes at a price. Pointy shoes are a killer. I just bought a pair last week when I went shopping with Vien. Hahah being very gung ho, I thought I must get a nice pair of pointed shoes for presentations etc.. Not exactly very pointed like an elf type, but ok lah. Quite nice and not very ex cuz I just got it at Far East (again..)

So I wore it today for work at the Asian Civilisation Museum. Hahha don't be so fast as to think I was a curator or sth. It was some Intel Conference held there. Oh boy, I stood and stood for like hours! My toes are aching, my whole feet's arched till I almost died. Basically, my feet's covered with blisters and in a contorted shape now.

See, this is the outcome of being vain and insisting on wearing that even when Vien and my mom said it would hurt. Hahha, I'm just like that. Stubborn. So I'm paying for the price of vanity now. Not just physical pain, but also a little of my pocket cuz I took a cab home from CBD area after work. Hahah with the jacket that I bought for work, I wonder if I still made enough to cover all the expenses. Then again, there's probably another fair next week. We'll see if they call me again.

Eagerly waiting for my pay now...

Finally got to visit Amy yesterday. Too bad we didn't get to see baby Issac cuz he was in ICU. Doctors were concerned cuz he didn't cry much at birth and didn't respond much to feeding. Thank God he started feeding much better yesterday. Poor Amy, she's kinda torn not being able to always visit Issac cuz he's in ICU. Hopefully he's able to come out today. But this is one cute l'ill baby! He's got such big eyes (can't imagine he opened his eyes just when he was a day old. Thought babies take quite a long time b4 they open their eyes to see the wonderful world.) and he's got a dimple on one side! Hhahaha, one hunk in the making.

So there's another baby boy in church. Can't imagine that all 3 couples tt got married are all having boys. What happened to Dav's silly calculation to guess that his was a girl?! Hahhaa oh well, goes to show how reliable these things are.

Gonna be visiting Amy again. Probably at her place. Hmm where am I gonna find those sarong to carry babies? Maybe I'll ask the rest whether they wanna share the present for her.

Goodie! I'm done with my research work. It's been like what 9mths of work? Hahhaa, then again, I didn't earn much from it. Ok lah, saved and spent some of them.

Talking abt 9mths.. AMY HAS DELIVERED! Should be I guess. She was induced into labour yesterday. Probably delivered either last night or this morning. What ever it is, welcome little Issak! Hope to visit her soon, either at the hospital or at home.

Am still waiting for the Thailand photos from the rest. Bugger, I really should have brought my own digi cam. Now I'm like a little beggar waiting for photos to be passed around. Can't post em either. Whatever, it's more important that they are gonna be in my album than online. I still prefer touching n looking at real photos, not digital ones you save on CDs. So unpersonal.

We'll see how when everyone meets up on Sat for practice for Youth Sunday. Yikes, why do we have to dance for Youth Sunday? Embarassing lor. Argh.. Anyway, we'll get to meet up with Sandy! Welcome to church girl!

I'm back from Chiang Rai! Man, it was an awesome trip.. Everything was better than I expected, although I was kinda plesantly suprised that the outskirts that we were in was a Christian village. So it was more of a time of encouraging people to continue giving their hearts to God rather than sharing the Gospel with people who have never heard of Jesus. Thought that it would be a 'wasted' trip initially cuz we visited many Christians, but on hindsight, I think it was a trip of lessons learnt. From day 1 to our final day (even just before we boarded the plane)

I've just been back like for 2days and I'm already missing the people there. They're always ever so cheerful, polite and gentle. How nice. Oh and the kids are sooo lovely! Bundles of energy. There's this girl who likes people to piggy back her. I still can't get her name, but we think that she's either an orphan or a farmer girl. Then there's our little darling Nong Ai. Very cute and a smart chick. We taught her stuff and she taught us simple Thai (cuz we usually had to rely on Rach to translate what she was rattling on abt) Hope she's got her holidays soon and comes to church with Pi Ben.

My prayers go out to Pastor Sutin (Ahzan-Boi), Pastor Pradit (Ahzan-Ken) and Pastor John (Ahzan-John) as they gather continually to pray for revival through out Chiang Rai. When I first heard about their desire to revive the place, I was so shocked. This same thing will probably not occur in SG, or at least not that I've heard of. Three men relying on nothing but pure faith for God to work a miracle in the land. To revive the church and stir up many hearts for God. Amazing eh!

If not for the pending Europe trip next yr, I think I'll definitely go back to Chiang Rai. Even if Pastor John welcomes us to join him in church planting elsewhere in Thailand, I think I really don't mind at all. We'll see about it. I may just squeeze both plans during the June holidays.

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Don't ever take budget airlines unless you're really ok with waiting. Air Asia is totally horrible. We had problems everytime we took their flights from day1. Yikes! And the price we paid was equivalent to that of regular airlines. It was kind of a blessing in disguise that our internal flight was cancelled and so we were given Thai Airways to reach BKK. And for that, we paid a price by not having time to meet Pi Arun at BKK to shop at Mabukong. Shopping at BKK was at a shopping complex, those considerably higher end ones in BKK. Bottomline was I didn't buy anything! Argh! I sound so loserish, going all the way to Thailand and not bringing back anything.

Anyway I guess I prefer Chiang Rai over BKK cuz the air is so much cleaner. BKK is dirty and hot. There's this layer of slime when you're there for too long. But it doesn't happen in Chiang Rai. Well, BKK is definitely more interesting cuz there are more places to shop and more modern.

It was great catching up with the rest yesterday night. Nice meeting Sarah! She's so petite. Very smiley too. Good match with Elliot. Heh.. Gabe, we're waiting for the next outing eh. Hmm maybe it's time we get to met Weiliang's gf. The task's yours!

Anyway so as I was walking home and indulging in my personal thoughts, I totally didn't hear this bicycle coming from behind and I almost got knocked over. Blimey, so careless of me. That's the problem when you are too engrossed in your thoughts. It was kinda weird but for that split second it seemed as though it was some scene out of those typical movies, the twist was that I saved myself. Haha..

Oh ryan and lydia, man I love you guys so much! Thanks for lending me the vcds and dvds! I've been enjoying my afternoons these past few days with the company of Hong Kong stars and Legolas. Hahah.. Thank goodness there are people like Daniel Chan, Edison Chen and Orlando Bloom to look at. This boring life of mine would have been so bored otherwise.

It's so weird how Mingbao's Ah Zhen plot (the one with Elliot, Gabe, Xian and the supposed mixed blood girl) is quite similar to that of Purple Storm. Just that Mingbao's was much shorter and less action packed. Hahah maybe it was a borrowed plot. Tsk. He should really put those comic strips into movies; just like the recent End Of Days. It'll be nice. Yeah, it's been a long time since the whole group of us sat around watching his movies and laughing at NG shots.

I'm a real sluggard. Can't get my ass off to do the stuff that I need to. Haven't prepared for my exam on Wed, neither have I started on Ming Bao's comics. Darn, I think I better start on his first. Then there are the things that need to be learnt and memorized for mission trip too. Yikes, I just sleep n sleep the whole afternoon away. I'm a real pig.

Tomorrow... Tomorrow will be the day when I find motivation to do everything. My new mantra.

We're all about to go for our misison trip really soon. It's gonna be more crash courses and rehersals for all that we're presenting to the schools. Gee, I'm really really looking forward to it. Just to see how even though the Christians are minority in Chiang Rai (it's <1%. can you beat that) they are still peservering on. We're also heading for some children's homes and schools to share the gospel. Our presentation will generally be more of the creative side because we can't exactly preach or share the Gospel in Thai. Oh but we all thank God for Pastor Sutin, his wife and other Thai members who are joining us there!

So for the past couple of trainings, we've been learning some simple Thai phrases and 4 Christian songs in Thai, simple drama and balloon sculpting. Hoho, I've gotta brush up a lot for all of them. My Thai is in pieces cuz all I know is sawadekah, thank you and how are you in thai. If I still can't really learn them, I'll just stick to some of the Thai people to translate for me. Heh.

Oh then there was the drama that's kind of like a Charlie Chaplin style mime (forget the white face tho) Boy oh boy, people who know me are very sure that I can't really act. All that self-consciousness and paisaeness. Haha, I just laugh at myself all the time. Thank goodness I'm just playing a minor role. Too bad they didn't need people to pose as trees or stones.

Picked up a little balloon sculpting from Pastor Cheng Huat yesterday cuz I missed the previous 2 lessons. Well a hilarious first attempt at making the sheep and lion. The sheep barely had a body, not to mention the weird head. My lion was probably a very skinny and tail-less cub. Ok, my second lion was much better, even though I took so long just to make it. Tying the knot after pumping the balloon already takes like a couple of minutes for me. Heh heh, so my only consolation is making a nicely shaped heart. Why? Cuz it totally doesn't involve twisting the balloons. Hahahha. Easy job.

Guess more than all of these, I really want to see how the misison trip goes in Chiang Rai. Wanna see God's hand at work in those people's lives. Also a time to finally surrender to Him and not always trying to run away from the call to try out missions. It's enough of running away for 2 years.

Supposed to meet the girlie gang at Rice Table later on. Aiyoh, but so many can't make it. It's the public hols girls.. Hahha oh well, nevermind. We'll gather the whole group another time. So meanwhile it's gonna be me, Fion and Xian at a large table which we reserved. Hahah.. Ops!

Holidays are just a time when you keep spending n spending. It's scary how much we eat and spend on entertainment. Yikes! What's making it worse is that I'm not working. Ahh...

Oh Chock, if you're reading this - Cheese's organizing ktv tomorrow nite with the rest of our class people. He asked me to tell u that Wai Mun's not going. I also can't make it cuz I'm meeting Wensi and dunno who else she asked. Should be the rest of the rugrats. Hahha, pls be prepared to treat us to prata when Yam comes back. Haahhaha... Bring Cliff along hor. That's part of the deal. Tsk!

Have been learning simple drums from David Alfred in church recently. It's some drums and guitar class that the church band has initiated recently. Obviously I opted for drums - wanted to learn back in sec sch but Nat said to gather more ppl to form a class, which didn't materialize in the end. So here I am, going for drums with some other ppl in church. Some from YZ and also my uncle. Hahha it's kinda strange to be learning drums with my uncle, who always look so serious. Apparently my mom says her two brothers were rock lovers when they were younger. Haha which explains why I always so CDs of those funny bands like Deep Purple and Scorpion in their houses.

Drums totally rocks! Not that I'm good at it, but somehow I've always been intrigued and facinated by drummers. How they can create this whole different vibe to music just with some percussion instruments. So far, I can only do the simplest style. Nothing fanciful. I still can't coordinate when they require both legs to move. Hahha, my motor skills are limited. We'll see whether I can do it by the end of the course. Hee.. Maybe my roots are still in the making of melody with the piano. Hahah, not that I'm also good at it. Always hid around by asking Joe/Xian to tune their guitars louder during worship back in those days when I was still in church band.

Church band. Guess I'm facing a huge huge inertia to getting back there to play during service. Cut the story short, I am very thin-skinned.

But whatever, I'll still just learn drums for fun first. Hahah..

Listen to Planetshakers @ www.planetshakersusa.com or www.planetshakers.com. An Aussie band tt's kinda nice, altho it resembles Hillsongs. Maybe I'll drag ppl to go with me to their next stop in SG from 28-29July.

The weather doesn't do any good these days. I so wanna play tennis!! Hmm anyone game to play tennis with me? Hahha but you'll have to bear with my out of court balls and everything else. Let's go play! Badminton is good too! Hahhaa, let's just get out of the house and move our asses!

Realize I'm so darn fair. Eeks! I totally hate being fair. Tt's why I don't exactly understand why people spend so much on whitening products. Why do people wanna look like a piece of bleached paper?? Then again, dark people might ask me why I like to be tan. Oh but being tan is good, gives you a healthy glow. Sentosa anyone?

Let's pray very very hard that Chiang Rai will be sunny when we go there for mission trip. Quite excited abt going for the mission trip. I've finally surrendered to God's pushing for a mission trip. Somehow He has let me run away from that for 2yrs. This time, He has pointed and pulled me back to going on a mission trip. See, we can never ever run away from what God asks us to do.

Not that I'm very well prepared for missions, but I guess God will prepare me in time. But I've gotta brush up on my thai in the meantime. Hahha I'm terrible at it. All I know is sah wah de kah. Hahhaha... Oh and we're all supposed to have a thai name so that it's easier to introduce ourselves in thai cuz english names are very difficult to pronounce. So I've got like 2 names either yin (lady. Hahhaa sounds weird rite. This is something Pastor Sutin gave. "Hi, I'm called lady." If you translate to chinese or dialect, it sounds awful!) or some translation of Magdalene, which is too long for me to catch.

The naming thing is werid cuz they can use fruits as names. Check it out, Pastor Sutin gave Rachel the name lemon (I've got no idea what it is in thai, but it means lemon in English) reason cuz he says Rach's style is like a lemon. Hahahha! We laughed till we almost died. And Rach had this totally screwed up face. But all's forgiven cuz it was just a fun exercise with names. Oh and Jess is given the name jambu (tt pink fruit) Hahaha, we form the fruity trippers!

Can't imagine I actually woke up at 6am today just to try sending my brother to sch. Argh my dreaded ride to ACS (I). Yikes, with my dad by my side. I'm already not very proficient in my driving skills, and I've gotta learn how to send my two bros to sch next wk! Aaaaahhhhhh!!!!

Sending Chris to Jurong is still ok cuz the ground is flat and there ain't much traffic in the morning, cept for the main roads. But to ACS?! What on earth am I doing there?! Not only is the path winding and narrow, but I feel so claustrophobic in my dad's little mini-van when there are all these Beemers, Mercs, Camrys and MPV blah blah blah around! I almost screamed in the van. What if I crash into one of em? It's not a very distant possibility. Especially if I've gotta stop in the middle of slopes. Oh man, check out the main entrance slope. It almost killed me and the car behind me. To think that female driver behind the Hyundai MPV had much 'faith' in me and stayed so close to the butt of my van. Argh, thank God I braked in time when I slid a bit. Phew!

I picture myself riding on a donkey taking careful steps up this trecherous mountain to reach a old and ancient castle at the top - to be devoured by the fire-breathing dragon in the end. Along the way, the donkey almost slipped off the narrow and rocky path. Looking down at the never ending abyss sends the chills.

For the first time, I sorta tried stopping on a slope and moving off without using the handbrake. Although my dad was all ready to pull it for me (again). Hahaha, I think I'm a totally dangerous driver. Pls dn take a lift from me unless it's a car (preferbly with auto gear. haha)

My legs are like jelly now, after all those leg exercise with the van. Vanessa, I agree that it's a total necessity to have an auto gear car. But I'll still ask you to retake your manual license. Pkg, haha I think I believe why you said you'll stall any manual car now. I stalled 4 times. Blimey!

This is gonna be just the first. Ah, I've gotta do it all alone next Tues to Fri! Pls pray for me k. That there'll be no accidents whatever. Although my dad said he wants me to send him and Uncle Richard to the MRT station on Tues, I think I better let dad to it. I'll take over from the MRT after they left. Uncle Richard's old and he better not be in shock. Elliot will kill me for that. Heh..

The feat of the day - I learnt how to control clutch and accelerator on a slope. Still learning, very lousy at it. 80% chance of stalling the car anyhow. Hahahahaha!

Holidays.. Smell so sweet. Guess I'm not going to really work cuz not only because no right minded person will still employ me for those super irregular work times, but also cuz I wanna relax. This is the last holiday ever. Gosh.. But for pocket money's sake and not to strain my mom's allowance to me, I might consider those one off jobs. Oh well, it depends lah.

Anyway I had a rather eventful Tuesday. I formatted the comp for the second time during the week (bless me cuz I've gotta do it again the coming week. it's infected again queenlay..)

Mingbao also passed me his comics to help him ink them. Hahaha think he might have made a wrong choice by asking a super not arty farty person to ink his nice comics. But yah he said it's going to be evangelistic like the last one he did, so it's ok. Yeah, so I was excited to try my hand at inking comics. Sounds chim rite, but it's basically outlining his pencil sketches. Hahha.. It's so fun!!! Nice. I won't say I did a great job, actually there were some mistakes here and there but I think they ain't tt major ones. We'll see Ah Bao's reaction when he sees them on Sunday. Maybe he'll pass me more to ink. Hahhaa, occupy myself during the hols.

For now, I'll just be a computer formatting 'expert' this holiday. Grr...

I'm gonna embark on my first attempt at formating the comp. Argh... I'm still looking out of the window waiting for Superman to fly thru my window and help me out. I never understand why on earth my brothers don't know how to do this. Doesn't all guys know stuff abt fixing computers? All they ever know is download some dumb games and play; complain to me when it doesn't work. Don't they understand tt I'm a computer idiot? Hahha, oh well, maybe after formating. I'll learn a whole lot more and save myself next time. Forget abt waiting for them to help.

Superman superman, where are you???

I feel a mix mash of things now. Partly happy that the holidays are just so near, looking forward to all the freedom and ultimate slacking. Oh and of course Chiang Rai mission trip. On the other hand, I'm totally freaked out by the exams. I've got a paper later this afternoon and it's the horrendous tax. Ahh..

I kinda love the subject, but it's scary at the same time when you've gotta take the exam. Liking it is one thing, but taking an exam brings on a whole different feeling. I hope Moira didn't set the marking scheme cuz she's darn strict and picky. An absolutely smart chick but very stringent. Going for her class takes up 110% of your brain power.

God bless everyone taking the paper later.

Meanwhile, I'll just chill at FAL and take a short nap. I can't think for a long time. My puny brain is you xian gong si.

I'm desperately looking forward to the hols, not exactly cuz I'm darn well prepared for exams. Kinda relaxed since it's open book. Somehow I sense tt I'm overestimating myself. Eee..

But yah, the lure of the holidays. Oooo.... I'm going to have the long awaited Rice Table lunch with Pkg. Oh, anyone wanna come along? Too bad Vane will be starting her sch again. This kinda sucks cuz the whole poly time schedule is so off and wrong. Dn dare ask Xian cuz her exams haven't even started, it'll be a looong way more to go for her. But the lucky lass is graduating this sem.

Pinning and hoping to play tennis when the holidays kick in. Miss those days where a whole bunch of us went to NIE (smuggled with Dav's one miserable NIE card) and took over almost all the courts. It was great! Time to move my ass.

This is a shocking morning. I just flipped the papers and saw that someone from NJ passed on last Sat. Boy, what a tragic end to his life. But thank goodness he was already saved (fr Church of Our Saviour)

I didn't know him personally, but just knew that we were from the same school. Somehow I can't grapple with things like this happening cuz we're all still young. Esp for guys when they just got to the next stage of life. This is tragic.

Lesson of the day: pls don't ride bikes. Those little moving things are dangerous cuz they're so little and wobbly.

God bless Jingwei's family

Blogger is going mad. Either that or my comp's going bonkers. I typed a whole lot of stuff but it didn't post! Argh..

Well, I'm not sure what the heck I'm thinking of with how I deal with my time. I'm complaining there's not enuff time to study, yet it's the same me who wastes it all away. Like what I'm doing now. Stuck at the comp again.. Got a hint of what God wants to tell me during yest's devotion. Proverbs 6 (verses 6-11 i think) "Oh you sluggard!" Tt's what my version says. Hahaha the word sluggard just POPPED out. Yikes, yet another 'lecture' frm God during devotion. Pkg knows how often this happens. Scary..

Anyway having lunch in sch yest was nice. A break from going to sch just for projects. Ryan treated me to lunch and we met Michelle (John's better half) Too bad I didn't really talk to her since she was with her friend and I was with mine. Oh her new hairstyle's nice. Interesting!

Oh Ryan, if u're reading this. THANKS FOR LUNCH! There'll be many more lunches once we start on Urban Planning over the summer break. =) There's Initial D too!

For those wondering if I've hitched myself with a bf: Ryan's a girl. Haha ok, I'm perfectly straight for the record. I'm not giving any prata treat any time soon, altho we can expect one big one from Chock. She promised to treat us. Hahaha.. We're waiting Chock.. Bring Cliff along! It's part of the deal eh.

Think I'm catching Suyu's infectious 'slothfulness' - I've been lazing around for days and I just plain tired even after sleeping so much. Drats. But yah, that's just how I'm evolving into a bundle of tired bones. I wanna sleep all day and do all things at my own pace.

Heard ppl saying there were tremors in SG yesterday because of the Sumatra quake. Hmm I was also in Jurong but didn't feel a single thing! It's both scary and awesome what God can do with the earth. We weren't created with a big bang, but by His loving hands. Yet God can also destroy things tt displease Him. Just like how it happened with the Great Flood. Yikes, who knows what will happen tmr.

For now, I'm contented to be living in tiny little SG away from all these disasters. God forbid it tt it shld also happen to us in the future. I'm a person of little faith and strength.

It's really disgusting how some people are so freaking rich while the rest of the world lives in abject poverty. For some, they're in a dilemma over which LV or Gucci bag to buy. To them, it's like a decision of their life. But for others, deciding on how to pay for the next meal's the big decision.

Some live by the principle of only finishing one thirds of their food to be on a diet. Some are already bone thin with only a third of every meal just to share it with their family.

The rich are striving to stay slim, with those stick figures with rib cages and collar bones jutting out, as their model. The poor are looking towards the day they pile on pounds.

Two world poles apart, but all living on the same planet, breathing the same air and having the same soul. Hmm, so ironic.

Maybe it's too extreme in this case to hit us hard. But it also happens in our tiny little world. How can some people (students actually) drive sports cars to sch, while the rest of us poor blokes spend like eternity each morning squeezing in the public buses? It's really disgusting how people are so rich to own their own car when they've yet to even pay taxes. Gross!

Ok, I sound sore abt it. I wanna drive too. Too bad the only way that I can ever do that is to really earn my bits to buy one next time. Meanwhile, I'll be a loyal customer of our public tpt.

I just went for some afternoon tea with the people of KPMG. Guess my definition of smart casual is really too casual. I can't imagine I actually went there in my jeans and a shirt. Gosh, I was kinda out of place in terms of my attire. Hahhaa, thank goodness we were sitting for most of the while. I thought it was some invitation across all the unis, didn't realize that it was just for NTU ppl. Ops, and I thought I could hide amongst the sea of people.

I'm glad I actually went for the talk. Not that I learnt a lot abt auditing, but it was a place where you learn how to really hold a conversation with strangers, or more precisely, corporate people. I ain't all that eloquent, but just talk lor. Talk as though you know em well, and just participate. Haha, sounds like a bit of an empty vessel rite? Yeah, I'm a vessel waiting to be filled with knowledge and life's experiences.

Anyway back to audit. It is a really competitive corporate world out there. You shine, or just fall off the track. Sounds all so harsh and brutal. But I guess that's true. I kinda gave up being overly ambitious, and got my bubble bursted last time and so I was almost going to be contented being a little person living my little life just being happy. Somehow this talk with the partners in KPMG ticked my little ego bubble again. Kinda makes me want to be more proactive. Like finding an internship or sth (but I can't cuz of FYP and the possibility of GE. Hmm..) Don't want to be overly ambitious cuz it can make one so cold and heartless, but I think just running at my own small little pace will do. Hmm, all talk is so easy, who even knows whether I can live up to my own standards.

For now, I'll guard myself against my little ego bubble. Better not let it get any bigger lest I am blinded. Shall shackle myself to the ground and God.

Listening to Boh Wai Fong do her silly Great Plains is a torture! It's pointless cause we're just following what she does at her computer terminal. I've no idea why I'm so stupid to attend the class. Not like I'm gonna be a Great Plains Expert. Darn.. Spoiler

Anyway the weekend was another wedding. One more to go this yr. Weddings are so nice to attend. Apart from the wedding dinner that is. Dinner is meaningless. Just a bunch of people sitting at the table n gorging over the endless dishes that come one after another. It's a great waste of good food cause no one hardly ever finishes them. Even Suyu's save the world mantra can't help her finish all of those food.

In fact the church wedding's the best part. So cute to watch those presentations. Hmm I've seen quite a couple of weddings. Haha don't panic, my friends are of marriageable age. Not some shot gun deep shit stuff. Funny how weddings somehow look alike but yet still capture your attention all the more. It's nice!

One more wedding to go - Furby & our ever-elegant Fat Lamb!
Vanessa and I can offer to be ur chauffers. Vane should get her license by then. Employ us! No more reception work already. Time for a change..

Listening to Boh Wai Fong do her silly Great Plains is a torture! It's pointless cause we're just following what she does at her computer terminal. I've no idea why I'm so stupid to attend the class. Not like I'm gonna be a Great Plains Expert. Darn.. Spoiler

Anyway the weekend was another wedding. One more to go this yr. Weddings are so nice to attend. Apart from the wedding dinner that is. Dinner is meaningless. Just a bunch of people sitting at the table n gorging over the endless dishes that come one after another. It's a great waste of good food cause no one hardly ever finishes them. Even Suyu's save the world mantra can't help her finish all of those food.

In fact the church wedding's the best part. So cute to watch those presentations. Hmm I've seen quite a couple of weddings. Haha don't panic, my friends are of marriageable age. Not some shot gun deep shit stuff. Funny how weddings somehow look alike but yet still capture your attention all the more. It's nice!

One more wedding to go - Furby & our ever-elegant Fat Lamb!
Vanessa and I can offer to be ur chauffers. Vane should get her license by then. Employ us! No more reception work already. Time for a change..

Kinda missed Reds training. And I'm going to miss it again. But I kind of foresee it coming all along. My time doesn't exactly permit me to participate in so many things. I'll probably be a stretched rubber band by then. Guess the dilemma between church, personal time and sacrificing them for training is the issue.

Time and time again, I'm not very sure if I really wanna go back to training hard like in JC (and it's going to be much harder this time considering it is club training). Honestly, I'm not very into competitive playing (so much for my past dream to play sports competitively for all my life). I'd rather have a leisurely game with friends over the weekend. Be it any kind of sports. Touch, tennis..

Ooo tennis. I can't really rank my love for either of these 2 totally different sports. Touch is a fun team game and I really like playing with the ruggrats. Tennis is just a game I loved since I was a kid. Too bad the long break between my craze then and now has made me a sucky player. I barely make it across the net and not beyond the baseline. I need a professional coach man!

So for now, I'll just continue feeling bad when Alice emails the training dates. Sheesh..

Fingers crossed everyone. It's the time where ppl start bidding for classes on the ever-so-undependable STARS. I hope I get my GE class and that Stella will give me the credits for helping her out. Haha if all goes well, I'd have cleared all my electives by June! Guess I'm not really going for modules I really like anymore, since they're only avail during term time and I can't possibly cope. So whatever that comes, it's good enuff! Let's hope the classes are nice and interesting..

Show others brotherly kindness. One of the 7 virtues we ought to show as disciples of Christ in 2Peter1. What struck me was this: we are the only Jesus the world may ever see. How big a responsibility we shoulder. The example of Mother Theresa was never as apt. The epitome of how we can show such kindness and love to others.

***

People step into different chapters of life at each stage. Priorities change, perceptions change, time changes. Everyone steps into another mode of life and go for things that are different. Today you might still have your chummies sitting beside you in your usual hang out corner, the next day, the circle of laze-around pals will dwindle. There's time that's gotta be spent with their other half and so on. Yah da yah da.. I may sound so cynical (probably some might be saying this at the back of their heads "Gosh, it's so easy for her to say such things cuz she hasn't got into any serious relationships. What on earth makes her think that she won't do such things if she ever gets into the same situation?) Yeah, I'm not qualified in that sense to say such things but there's gotta be some line drawn between sharing time together. Nothing wrong abt that, but we still need to spend some time with our long time pals. Can't just chuck them aside rite. Either that or introduce your circle of friends to each other. It's nice and warm.

Sheesh, I better not get myself into a complaning mode lest I'm labelled as a whiny and sore person. Tata!

Has anyone heard of the new drama Chase? Haha you bet I'm gonna catch it as much as I can cuz there's Utt. Altho he looks so scruffy in the show, I think it's still worth a watch.

Something's really interesting abt the character names. Ellie and Gabriel. Hahahha, exactly the names of Gabe n Elliot! Oh gosh Gabe, you're supposed to be chasing after Ellie and wait for 'him' for 10 long yrs! Hahahhaha, this is gonna be so cute eh. Sorry Gabe, I can't help finding this really funny. Wow, Ellie has long hair..

::Catch Chase on Thursdays on Ch5 @ 8.30pm::

It is really tiring to run along for some cause that was supposed to be a common thing all alone. Well almost. Each time when something needs to be settled, it almost practically falls on my hands. Not that it totally isn't my responsibility, but it would be nice if we all shared the burden sometimes. It both worries and scares me how people can give you an immediate answer to a request. It almost sounds like I walked right into a shut door. I will really appreciate if sometimes others just show some support or at least some appreciation of what you have done. I'm covering so much for others until I feel as tho I'm taken for a free ride. Esp on my PMSsy days and I don't feel gd abt much things.

I can't possibly cover each and everything everytime for you guys. By right, I should be just going there to give you support. You guys are still the real ones who should be providing the voice for the mass. I definitely won't hesitate in helping you guys. You know better than anyone how I've been helping out. I'm not sure if I'm not firm enough in my stance, and I might not be assertive enough. But yah, I can't possibly keep giving people my time. It's taking a toll on my personal time too.

Too much of grousinga and complaining makes me feel tired. Tomorrow's a better new day.

Thanks Lydia for your lovely vcds! Edison Chen will definitely make my day. Not some dunno what kiddo you told me from dunno what Taiwanese band. Edison still wins hands down. Tsk..

i'm really supposed to be studing right now. such an ill-disciplined creature. ought to be shot dead. haha.. my running session failed yest. i was too lazy to move when i got home. so wen, even when i finished i still didn't run. boo hoo hoo.. i'm just a bag of lazy bones.

shucks, the hols seem to be ending and i've yet done anything contructive. just idling during the day, watching tv and finally turning in early for the night. grr, i haven't done anyth. i hate the thought of sch starting again.

my ns friend told me it's good to study. there's a sense of purpose. maybe lah, but it's absolutely hectic! guess girls haven't got tt 2yr break from studyin like the guys. we're on different frequencies when it comes to being excited abt studying. haha gabe, you might be one of those enthu ppl waiting to charge into smu eh?

for now, I HATE SCHOOL!!!

really enjoyed hanging out with the ruggrats as usual. it was great. not tt we had much excitement, but the chat was just nice. it's always so nice to catch up with the gang, altho we seem to keep having prata each time. tt's not too good, cuz it's fattening. haha

wensi amazes me by how well she understands me sometimes. what she says just wack right into my face. or maybe it's just tt i'm an easy person to read. anyway, she suggested tt i play with lion reds for the fun of it. i don't know whether i really should. i'm kind of used to my life now tt's not dictated by my trg sessions and stuff. but part of me longs to play rugby. guess i suck at it now. there's another part tt tells me not to play cuz there's my stupid little pride at stake. cuz the rugby circle's so small, the fact tt you're lousy shows. i don't know, maybe someone or sth will come inspire me to play again. one thing i'm quite sure of is tt i won't be playing for NTU, provided some miracle or spark of enlightenment strikes me. then again, the new blood is so fast i won't be able to catch up. haha slow poke bike..

playing rugby in nj was the highlight of my sports life. it was both fun and i indulged in the love n closeness we had as a team. it was really a team. a far cry from what you see in NTU. when i played last yr, i just didn't feel tt i really belonged to the team and it totally killed me love for the game (at least when i played with them) if you ask me what exactly i don't like abt NTU rugby, i can't really pin down the exact reason. no team bonding, pride, my lousiness, the lack of an inspiring coach? one thing for sure is tt i'll love my ruggrats forever. everyone, shaqi, raisin, musketeers, chock, mighty mouse, lobster, the speedsters: auntie jac & yam yam.. this is disgusting to say but i even respect our foul-mouthed and bad reputation coach rong (beefcake as lobster and i call him)

mighty mouse had to remind me abt my game last time yesterday during dinner. no idea why they said i cld be the game maker at my side of the field. i don't even see myself doing lots. guess i worked well with yam as the left wing. i'll always respect coach for what he told me. nothing really big but it was the start of how i picked up the game and eventually made it into the team. used to just be tt teamB player. yeah, beefcake's a good coach even tho there are moments we really hate him and his 'golden' finger. slap me or what if you're one of the anti-rong jingxings, but i respect him as a coach. he really teaches a different type of ball game. hmm, maybe if i go to lion reds and train under ann & karen (the wedded lesbian couple. eks) i might change my mind and include ann in my respected coach list. we'll see.

yesterday's worship was good. teck wee's good at leading the congregation as usual. yeah, it's time we had this kinda worship both in main congre and yz. hmm, wonder when we're going NCC with amy and pkg. shld be soon i guess.

went to watch white noise with vane, suyu and chor ing. some kinda mini farewell for chor ing who's going back to melbourne this wed. lucky girl who's perpetually travelling. anyway the show was dumb. it wasn't scary just those sudden noises and screams. hahha vanessa tugged my sleeve and we both screamed. gosh, we were the only 2 idiots who screamed in the whole cinema. hahha.. then chor ing's scaring herself while suyu's laughing her way off thruout the show. dn advise ppl to watch. quite boring and no big climax in the storyline. bleah.

had a nice chat with chor ing abt YAM while we were out yest. hmm, i'm looking forward to having YAM. wonder how it's like. but at least it's going to be a gd grp tt caters to our age ppl. hahha.. let's pray hard abt YAM. it's time we had a grp like this. maybe not as well estab like PUNJ, but it's gd enuff to have a gathering with ppl your age. i feel kinda old with the sec kids. altho sometimes i blend in with my height. ops!

when anyone mentions the word chef, you think of that italiano who has a long and carefully-twisted moustache with a big belly and long white paper cap. with the finger lickin sign saying
"mmmm! fantastic!"

wait a min. there's been this attack of the dishy chefs aka naked chef jamie oliver and the italian guy on ch5. boy, they look more like lads in a boy band or some italian soccer team, not even chefs. probably the customer who's sitting at tt little table with a pretty lady over some romantic dinner for two. who ever thought that chefs would be so cool?

suddenly it seems that chefs are more like the dish instead of that french dessert. haha desperate housewives suddenly taking cooking classes. gosh, it's the invasion of the lookers instead of the cooks-to-be. the cook shows we see are more like lifestyle pages, chances for you to oogle at the trendy and suave chefs. no more aunty aka fang tai type of cook lessons on tv. gone are those ugly cook shows with the recepies and ingredients list plaguing the tv. sad story for those who really wanna learn how to cook.

whatever the case, i don't mind watching these shows. i absolutely can't cook, but my pride tells me yeah i can 'learn' along the way while watching these shows. hmmm tastes so good. haha.. jamie oliver's taken (he's gotta cook for his little girl now. bah) so i don't mind taking an italian dish

happy lunar new year!!! dong dong dong qiang... gong hei fat choi! hahha my overused cantonese phrase when i see old cantonese ppl. tt's all i can really say.

i'm glad to announce tt i'm well! yipee.. hahha so i ate quite a bit at everyone's house yest. but had to control until the last few places. sheesh.. yeah, ah xian's also done with her chicky pox to be able to go out!

my neighbour's so funny. we had reunion dinner together. so the older guys drank. and he was so silly to join everyone else to drink. then had rashes. haha duh.. my little cousin was so cute too. all dressed in her china girl dress, then playing with guns with the boys. hahha, so weird. but i guess the girls in my hse are all like this. too many male cousins, you just play along with em.

i'm just gonna enjoy the holidays. can't really bring myself to spoil the festive mood with so much sch work. eeks...

so anyway, happy new year to everyone! xing xiang shi chen, feng sheng shui qi. wow, i'm impressed by my knowledge of cheng yus. thanks to my cousins lynn n joey, never fail to come up with new cheng yus when greeting everyone. ok here goes my last one: zhu dai ga, LONG MA JING SHEN!

the weekend has just been a time to soak up the cny atmosphere. i totally didn't do anyth over the wkend. i watched all tt tv cld offer on fri, and sat was just a whole day out. sunday was slacking and i only panicked at nite.

gosh, chinatown is jam packed! i only went frm 2-6 and it was already so packed. oh man, i've never been to chinatown so close to cny. eeks! people squeezing with people. but for the atmosphere, it's much better than my miserable little town central. after chinatown, sent my granny and grand aunt home, and popped by toa payoh central. oh gosh, it was equally packed w ppl at the pasar malam. enuff people watching for the day.

the greedy me ate so much of the goodies at home, i've got a terrible sorethroat now. bummer. drinking some brown thing my grandpa gave me. it tastes weird. ah, i never can control those little prawn rolls. my retribution for finishing almost half of whatever prawn rolls we have at home. i live in regrets now..

---

man, mac@orchard HASN'T CALLED ME! hrmph, i called and they said the shipment's delayed cuz they expect it to also come, but hasn't arrived. oh man gabe, ahhh! you saw it at the shops!! man, so i'm just eagerly waiting for that 'miracle' call to collect my i-shuffle! sound so much like a brat, a kid waiting in anticipation to blow out that birthday candle. my patience is growing thinner each day. and my bro keeps saying i got cheated. how can mac cheat me rite? it's their company! silly chris.

yipee! it's so much closer to the cny holidays! woohoo! hahha, it's so great knowing that for next wk i'm only studying in sch for 2.5hrs. hahha, i guess it's is the most slack week of my sch life.

somehow i hated cny last yr, but this is different. i'm kinda looking forward to it. sheesh, maybe i'm secretly hoping dad will let me drive a bit. oh but it's kinda scary, we might just step onto each others nerves over driving during the festive season. hmm, maybe i'll tag along with my cousin. hopefully he has his friend's car this new yr again. haha..

poor couz, he's gotta go thailand for army trg on 2nd day of new yr. bummer.. oh well, he's a regular, so he's paid for this anyway. can't imagine he actually signed on with the army. hahha he used to be tt kid who taught me each street fighter characters' super powers, played ninja tutles with me and cried for his transformer toy. hahah the red indian for all the mischief we got into, including getting ourselves lost in the old plaza sing. hahah... dumb things we did when we were young.

ok couz, all the best for your trg!

Listening to Jamie Callum is such a treat. Not a good lookin chap, but a real talent with the piano. Guess I never had that some amount of musical inclination all my life. I like music, but I guess I just can't 'create' music like some others can. Know a whole lot of crazily talented ppl who just have it at their fingertips. So cool aint it? Yah ppl like me who don't have the little gift can just sit back and admire those who form bands. Haha I don't even qualify being the backups. Probably just the audience. But it's still nice to listen to bands. Maybe it's time to listen to more indie stuff.

Rooney's great. The band featured in OC for ignorant ppl. Might have stepped on the toes of ignorant ppl, but who cares man. It's nice to listen to songs tt match your mood. Oh but no country music or dance tracks pls. Country may be classic but ain't my cuppa. Dance is just plain lousy. Nothing great, all electric beats or whatever you call it. Off to my musical wonderland. A place tt I can only participate as the audience.

i got the iPod shuffle!!!! yippee! haha went with the girls to mac@orchard yest. and i ended up pre-ordering it. sad to say, i think it wasn't as nice as i expected it to be. but hey it's an iPod, so whatever. so i thought i burned a hole in my pocket for buying it. not sth really a necessity but really a want. the surprising thing is dad shoved me the money to make the purchase when i came home! ahhahha, love ya bits dad! i feel kinda bad cuz i'm earning (altho it's pittance compared to what i spend) and i ought to like pay for it myself. guess i'll make it up when i get my miserable salary. a treat? hmm, everyone's sick at home. maybe not. will see how. but for now, i'm eagerly waiting for apple to gimme a ring to say tt the shipment's arrived! hoho, so exciting..

it's so nervewrecking to have to live with a slow computer bugged with all sorts of viruses. having to restart and disconnected from using the net totally kills me. urgh. gosh, it's as bad as listening to lousy auditions on idol tv. bleah. wished i had some elder brother who can do all the computer IT thing for me. being a complete idiot at this formating thing doesn't help all the time. boo..

now tt i'm hearing more ppl tell me maybe i-pod shuffle ain't tt good. i'm a bit skeptical now. but yeah, i'll arm myself with more knowledge when i get by mac shop to ask. probably over this or next weekend. i'm so superficial cuz i really like the look of i-pods. hmm... how how how..

mp3 players galore.. boy, there's this new i-shuffle from the i-pod series. so cute! it's so slim n nice. pearly white. and the price is super affordable! $178 for 512mb!!!!! ahhh... i'm in a great dilemma whether i shld buy it. it's much cheaper than creative i think. so far, creative stuff are ex. altho you're paying for quality pdts obviously. wonder if the i-shuffle takes wma files or purely mp3 files. whether it's compatible with windows computer. and if i need to buy additional programs to enable file transfer. oh gosh, i'm in this mood of splurging..

it's hard when u're not working and plan to do so much. going to thai mission trip this yr, europe backpack when i grad (which is next yr) or kathmandu if we can't get the funds for a gd trip to europe. yeah, so how? shld i just empty my already little salary frm research work to buy this i-shuffle? ahh... it's not a necessity, but it looks like such a good deal. unless someone tells me there is really a better deal outside. help..

this has been a weekend of learning about work n rest. first it was during bible study. then again it was touched upon in sermon. as usual, God speaks to me in very scary ways. He sorta 'scolds' me through my bible study lah, daily devotion lah, sermons.. yeah. every possible way. (can't imagine what happens if He speaks to me in a voice. think i'll faint)

so it's a session on how to really manage my time. to take time off and recollect myself; to spend time away from all other worries; to put those worries unto His feet: to rest in Him. it's really what i need now. it's been a rather packed week, yet again. and i'm starting to feel kinda drained having to juggle with so much. i've been thinking about my own personal time nowadays. given the character i am, i value it a lot. at least to have time to spend with my friends. so i guess this is it. i'm taking a break from some stuff and hanging out with pkg on friday. maybe just to new creation for a change of environment. it's time to visit other churches.

as for now, i'm going to just try and take things easy. not to rush myself through things. smell the roses and admire the scenery tt comes by. going to dream more and shut an eye on things.

i really shldn't be blogging right now. but since my dad's in the shower, it's a great excuse to go online (and get stuck there subsequently)

life's kinda getting to be a drag now. it's so darn routine. sad thing is, despite it being so routine, i'm still unable to catch up. it's sch work, research, church... i'm like elasti girl being stretched, not to the max yet but enuff to make me scream. yikes! almost no more social life. and i'm not even in rugby anymore. can't imagine if i'm playing (hahha if they don't kick me out first) guess i can be a 24hr running clock if it really happens.

sheesh, haven't met up with ruthie since she came back like ages ago. sorry babe, we'll meet up on thurs k? i'm really really sorry dear. supposed to like hang out with you soooo long ago. we'll make it up with the short catch up time on thurs yah. it's back to those times of walking ard aimlessly and cracking silly jokes abt ppl. hahaha... my evil twin. just kiddin. =)

ok, dad's outta the showers, so it's time to bathe! oh btw, listen to pug jelly. they're great!

we whine all day that life's unfair. why are some ppl given such an easy life yada yada, you get my idea. but flipping thru the papers, watching the news and hearing of stories of ppl stuck in those tsunami hit areas makes us look really pathetic. here we are enjoying the comforts and soaking in areas of life we take for granted. our security, peace, family, friends n loved ones. sometimes ppl ought to be smacked to shake em out of their little bubbles of 'me and my own world' those ppl are stuck and their lives are thrown into some big state of upheveal, worrying abt where their families are, how they're gonna turn out of that pit of life. if we're whining and complaining over why we don't have a holiday, that new i-pod mp3 player, the latest mobile and what not, i think we're in the wrong direction.

our very breath is the most basic thing we take for granted. ppl die in the most unfathomable manner. name it, i think someone in the world has died of tt manner. choking on fishballs, getting struck by a flying flower pot, being banged by a vehicle while walking on the pedasterian path...

why does God allow such a disaster to happen? a question that was popped to paster ch. guess there isn't a firm answer anyone can give, not even the highest priest or bible scholar. it's just God's plan and we'll never fully understand it. the only thing we're sure of is that God is soverign in all situations. a unshakable pillar of support and strength. our dependence. so easy to say, but all so hard to do it with fullest of all conviction. we're just control freaks, trying to get a hold on every aspect of our lives, to twitch it into the plan we've mapped out for ourselves. mind us, man plans but our God directs. so bless all mankind (including myself) who try to get a grip on our life's plans. guess we can only go forth in fullest faith.

oh she of little faith..

this is the end of week 1. guess this sem's gonna be a stressful sem. never-ending pile of readings. just the first week and i'm getting a little cock eyed. yuck. my little 'son' ryan just left yesterday. felt kinda bad tt i didn't go to airport to send him off. nevermind i guess, he shld be back for ns soon. anyway this son is freaking loaded to come back regularly. hahha.. ops, i didn't get his blog add. tt's it. i've only got a phone no (for local use. bleah)

anyway to those 3 girlies in canada: I REALLY REALLY MISS YOU GUYS!!!!!!! boy, qinlei seems to be super freaked out with the co-ed bathing. hahha i guess i wld to. but boh pian, just gotta live with it. cannot powder bathe all the time leh. hahh easy to say but so darn hard to do it. rou, do you know tt your good friend foo is in so many of my classes? hhahhaa so close yet so far. hahha i'm just being dumb. anyway this sem's classmates are weird. maybe it's cuz everyone's in with cliques. so everyone's not all tt friendly. or maybe i'm the one not being friendly. oh whatever, i can't really be bothered now. i like staying in my comfort zone of friends.

this is gonna be a week with friends heading out of singapore in little hoards. first off: roujun, qinlei and lixuan. today: shiwei. thursday: ryan (my little adopted son haha..)

funny how everyone's leaving out of town over this short week. hey you guys, take care of urselves k! shiwei, so sorry man. suye didn't tell us if she was going so i dind't go. anyway, spare you of the teary moments. hee hee you little hum bao.

also had dinner with our family friend's whole family who came for holiday frm mauritius. it was fun playing with the kids even though most of the time i had no idea what the kids were telling me. it's all in francoise!!! how to understand? guess my love for french came when i met them since i was a kid, and when i went to visit em in mauritius like ages ago. boy it's got beaches that take your breath away. but ryan's so cute, me made me carry him (a tiny 4-yr old kid) from the restaurant in suntec to his hotel in conrad. hahha.. don't mind carrying him. he's so light for a boy anyway. and tina (who's a little bigger so i can't carry him) speaks all so fluently. can tell she speaks a lot even though it's all so french. but i love her too cuz we're both the same- the only girl admist all male cousins. hahha... the french greeting is so warm and friendly. you've gotta hav cheek touching cheek (altho male vs male greet with a handshake) and it's so awesome when the kids greet you. hahha esp when ryan and tina lavishes you with a bear's hug and super wet kisses coupled with a wide smile and giggles. wait till they day they learn chinese (cuz they're chi) and firm up their english, we'll just be friends who look at fishes (the thing they saw at the restaurant. sheesh)

human feelings are a complex thing that is so dynamic and ever-changing. i'm a living example. in the morning, i was irritated with my dad telling me how mass comm isn't as good as accountancy. gosh, i've heard it a million times frm him. it's the same old story and rationale for them encouraging me to take accountancy. for goodness sake, i already am in accountancy and i'm not planning to take mass comm! ahhhh..... i almost suffocated in the car seat having to hear this yet again. God bless my eardrums. usually i take a stance to support mass comm and that choice of study shouldn't be for practical commercial-value reasons but for the essence of personal learning. funny how i believe in all these but yet i took accountancy in the beginning with not much personal enthusiasm. but whatever it is, the debate with my dad lasted until i reached CS block (thank goodness it only started at the junction before NTU, so it wasn't such a long long ride, tho i would hope it was much shorter)

along came my work with photoshop. again. bleah. i hate it! so here's the mix of feelings. altho my 'dream' is to take comm studies, but everytime i do those tedious work in CS, i really see no point to all those detailed work that takes hours at one go just to achieve something that looks a teeny weeny bit different from the original. that's when i really hate CS and am totally averse to it. yucks! how can someone sit in front of a computer all day just to do some menial job editing? i'm only doing pictures. how about those doing videos or sound editing? gosh, it's so inefficient! knowing the impatient side of me, i can't take it when we keep editing some minor thing that doesn't seem to make a difference because it is impossible (or at least unachieveable to a person who isn't trained in such photoshop or whatever stuff) and i thot we were done with all the photoshop issues. they keep diggin up new things to do with photoshop when we have already settled and accepted whatever that was done.

bleah, my mood is horrible now and i hope meeting the ruggrats will make my day. supposed to drop by sim lim again to change my thumb drive, but i'm not sure if i can make it now. then again, should i even go? was the problem i experienced with my sleek looking thumb drive a real prob or just my com? i really like how it looks, but really, looks are deceiving. it doesn't really match up in features. hurmph, too bad i'm not able to afford the sony, imation or iomega version that looks all-so-cool. but anyway thanks qinlei for accompanying me there! if you weren't there, i'd probably be lost at sim lim tower, haven't even reach sim lim square. hohoho...

haven't been blogging for ages. just had enuff of computers. anyway christmas was ok. finally got transferred frm the chinese to english congregation. it's been 5years since i was baptised. guess chinese congregation was just for my grandparents to witness the baptism. totally no connection with the chinese congregation. so together with uncle richard and another thai guy, we were transferred. yeah! oh that also means i've gotta attend EOGM next time. bleah..

haven't been moving my muscles throughout the entire holiday. i'm turning into a blob of fats, full of lethargy. esp my ever growing belly. yucks!

went to kbox with my uncle, aunt, grandma and mom yesterday. gosh, it was all the oldies! hahah.. not like i'm an avid singer, but i can recall tunes in my head. so it was a session of learning oldies and having my goosebumps stand at the sight of the awful so called mtvs. who would ever wanna take a mtv with a couple posing around the ancient village in sentosa?? check out those fake 'ooo look into my eyes' type of face. hahaha hilarious! i'll go for original mtvs anytime. but yeah, my mom's side of the family loves to sing. it's a common thing they do. so the boys just go gaming in the meantime. and i'm stuck (again). ron suggested that i pick up counter strike so that i can join em. hahhaah that's a big joke man. how can i play cs? i'm so retarded when it comes to such strategy computer games. well, for now. i don't mind sitting in the room and laughing at those ugly mtvs..

computers slice both ways. it can make your life a breeze, and at the same time wreck it just cause we're all so dependent on it. unless you're a real urban hermit, it's unlikely that you don't need some IT in your life. for tech idiots like me (IT for dummies totally don't help) anytime your 'trustie' computer burns, you're suffering frm worse burns than the comp. i'm already having 3rd degree burns frm being stripped of a working computer. what i'm having now is a totally substandard one. i just bought the comp like less than a yr ago. darn compaq!

the other day, my mom was mentioning that she saw this sony robot on tv (whatever name it's called) and it could move almost like a human! call it some big step in human invention, but the truth is it's also a sign that we're a step closer to having robots so human like that bicentenial man might not be fiction anymore. scary thought. i wouldn't wanna interact with a robot in that manner. i'm old fashioned in this sense. i like real human contact.

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went to evan's granny's wake yesterday with uncle richard and my dad. ellie, i really admire your gramps. he's one fiercely independent senior. if i've got a hat on now, i'll tip it to him (too bad i'm not into hats. i look odd in it) uncle richard's still driving at his age (think he's 80), taking photos, looking after himself and reading the Bible without any glasses!!! and little hannah mok treats uncle richard as a gd friend. hahha ain't it so cute?

thought of my jc mates when i was listening to the cd wei kit burned for me on my way to sch today. really wonder how everyone's doing. guess we were not exactly a very close knit bunch. weiliang, lyris, joce, zhimin, ruth, jac, wei kit, wai mun. ruth's back, so it'll be nice to catch up with the whole lot together. ruth, so msg me when u're free k? i bet everyone's queuing up to go out with u since u're back frm aussie. hahah.. and don't tell me you're getting fat again. u always look the same anyway. hee..

have been wanting to post pictures on the blog. but knowing my very limited knowledge of tech stuff, i doubt it'll be up. oh well, i'll just stick to the traditional way of having them in copies for my album. it's more nostalgic this way also. can't imagine myself having to 'flip' my album on a computer. seems so harsh and unpersonal. till i figure out how to do web hosting for photos, my blog is entirely words. boring rite.

it's back to work soon. bleah. i hope stella's pretest goes fine and i didn't ruin anything for her. ops..

it's been tiring the past couple of days. learnt how to use photoshop when i was editing stuff for stella. taught by louis. he's kinda irritating at times, but ok lah. attention seeker, so he can get on ppl's nerves a bit. his saving grace is tt he taught me photoshop. haha, i sound so practical.

anyway just watched band aid twenty's "do they know it's christmas" nice song with a star studded band. what's more touching is the purpose for this band aid twenty formation. doing something for the famine in ethiopia. we live in such an unbalanced world. some countries are fighting the battle against the flabs, while others are fight the war on malnutrition and famine. it's a sorrowful state that our world is so unfair. it kind of boils down to where you were born into. if you're living in upstate manhattan or paris, good for you. but what if you're born in the rural states of africa? sometimes i wonder why God allows such things to happen. it's definitely for a purpose. the question is what purpose is it? a lesson for the world? a punishment for the wrongs done by their forefathers? we won't actually know till we ask God personally.

i'm not really all that garang, but sometimes i do have off the track dreams. serving as a youth on dulos, travelling to africa to help build schools. some of my dreams. wonder if i'll ever muster the courage to step out of my comfort zone to get there now. it's ok, i'm contented to have them rest in my mind as an illusive dream.

www.bandaid20.com/

camp was fabulous. the camp comm was great! boy it's really nice to be a camper. refreshing change. God was great. He held the clouds and provided the sun and nice weather. but my lousy skin didn't pick up any tan. sorry me. sorta got used to it (altho i hate to admit tt i can never get a sunburn)

my grp was interesting. had a nice time talking to charles and druce. finally signs of druce growing up. probably he has already grown up, just tt we never realized it till now. or at least for me. charles is a smart ass. very mature for his age. but what strikes me most is his understanding of profound truths even when he ain't from a christian family. amazing eh?

well bday fell during camp and as expected i got dunked. actually i didn't really expect it to come cuz it happened at night, and i thought i was gonna be spared of any tricks. haha.. but silly me didn't realize tt as long as the day hadn't ended, there was still a chance of being tua. kena dunked into the salty waters of sentosa and ate the super delicious cake in my wet clothes. anyway, thanks to everyone man! esp pkg and the girls. *muack* i'm still trying to fit into the sandals. but chances are tt i can't make any progress making my feet smaller, so i've gotta change the size soon. nonetheless, thanks peeps!

i'm a total wuss when it comes to night trails. my biggest fears combined: to be alone in the dark, and it's in the forrest. oh man! i was already freaked out before it all started. pride got the better of me and i thought i might as well give it a shot to overcome my fear. so i went unpaired down tt scary trail. eee... goosebumps... way before the trail, i already had some little taste of being in the dark. was in the toilet bathing with the girls just before midnight. we were happily bathing and chatting when THE LIGHTS WENT OFF! shiwei and i just screamed our lungs out. ahh, how to bathe in the dark?? what happened? hurriedly try to wash any soap off and got out of the toilet asap. never in my life have i bathed so quickly. hair still damp with some conditioner and dashed out. conclusion: don't bathe at the toilet near tanjong beach after midnight, lights are off automatically.

back to night trail. by the middle of the stretch, i was almost a wreck. this sounds so silly and lousy, but i almost cried. luckily i was so slow in walking that ivan caught up with me. with my new night walk mate, we stumbled our way down. in the midst, we bumped into each other and also the stupid rubbish bin that was right smack in our paths. don't ever ever walk the dragon trail at night. it really gives you the creeps. you can see those white fake bones sticking out of the ground. esp the skull and ribcage. gross. when we came to the skull, ivan and i stopped momentarily. staring at it and stuck to the ground. for that split second i almost ran forward at 100km/h. eks!

night trail really made me think abt how much i relied on God. suye offered to pray for me before i started. but i was so caught up with my fear that i wanted to get it over and done with quickly. didn't pray with her then. my first mistake. down the path, all my mind was thinking of was "shit, why did i let myself do this?", "how on earth am i gonna finish this?", "what the??!! how come the journey takes so long? longer than the 15mins we were told" you get the idea. should have prayed and covered my ears to listen to my humming of praise songs. my second mistake. i've got vivid imagination, so it was so easy to picture a thousand things in my mind. instead of keeping my mind focused on God's help to lead me out, i fed my mind with those stupid thoughts. my thrid mistake.

i was so awed at my brother's comment for the night trail. he's also afraid of the dark, but it's the most memorable thing for him throughout the camp. he keeps saying how happy he is to know that God gave all of us night vision to help us get out of such lightless situations. he totally enjoyed it even though he completed half of the thing all alone (after cx3 left him halfway) sometimes the greatest lessons and enlightenment come from people you least expect. but i'm really happy my brother enjoyed the camp and learnt from these experiences. hope he finds some more friends among the older guys to stay in YZ. praying for a good DGL for him.

the camp held many firsts for me. first time setting up a tent (could hav done it in crescent but i can't rem, so i'll just take this as my first) first time walking alone in the dark (my own mini lifetime achievement award). first time getting scratches and blisters just for playing beach volley and beach touch at palawan. now my feet are in a sorry state. blisters, scratch marks etc. never used to have such serious consequences from playing at the beach. goes to show how coarse the sand at palawan is. not sure how i got my bruises on my leg either. hmm.. funny.

end of the day, camp was fun. zargo, iera, quigma & chee chee wa wa = survivors with the Saviour.

singapore idol. interesting and exciting watch. never thought singapore would be so enthusiastic and swept over by the fever. guess singaporeans are stereotyped to be so logical and uninterested in such idol worship. still, it was a great watch.

TAUFIK'S THE MAN!! versatile like a chameleon. wacks any genre dissed in his face so well. so much better than sly. don't really fancy his style. rocker's cool but it's just that. he can't do ballads and stuff. guess yesterday's show wasn't abt the vocals anymore. no questions that each have strengths in their unique voices, it was how they moved the crowd with the performance. man, i will wanna hear taufik sing with oli. ok i'm a little whammed up with the craze like some teen (oo i'm turning 20! quite sad cuz i'm out of my 10s, but yeah another phase of life again)

kind of guilty for not attending prayer service even after david personally asked us to go. torn between watching idol and corporate prayer. guess i flipped and chose idol watching. honestly, i'd be yearning to watch idol even if i was at prayer service. God, pls don't shoot me down with lightning for saying this.

anyway, it's camp later! woohooo!! i'm so looking forward to be a camper after being in the organising committee for like 3 yrs straight. it's nice to be a camper at times. just chill and enjoy. so here it goes! gabe, ur games better be fun yah. can't wait to get a tan. pls pls pls let me be burnt. i dn mind. never had a sun burn in my life anyway.

oh so update on the europe trip. wah calling all peeps who wanna go to europe in say 2006/7? still quite tentative abt the date. wensi wants to do it with her exchange in smu, which is after i graduate. meaning i'm already working. so kind of tricky how i can take 1mth leave. it was a tossup between US and europe for xiao, but i'm so bent on europe. so ended up persuading her to take her europe exchange. so anyone wanna come along? shoestring budget trip. so chill abt the cash. i'm ultra broke too. saving up in bits, but it seems such a long way to go.

singapore idol. interesting and exciting watch. never thought singapore would be so enthusiastic and swept over by the fever. guess singaporeans are stereotyped to be so logical and uninterested in such idol worship. still, it was a great watch.

TAUFIK'S THE MAN!! versatile like a chameleon. wacks any genre dissed in his face so well. so much better than sly. don't really fancy his style. rocker's cool but it's just that. he can't do ballads and stuff. guess yesterday's show wasn't abt the vocals anymore. no questions that each have strengths in their unique voices, it was how they moved the crowd with the performance. man, i will wanna hear taufik sing with oli. ok i'm a little whammed up with the craze like some teen (oo i'm turning 20! quite sad cuz i'm out of my 10s, but yeah another phase of life again)

kind of guilty for not attending prayer service even after david personally asked us to go. torn between watching idol and corporate prayer. guess i flipped and chose idol watching. honestly, i'd be yearning to watch idol even if i was at prayer service. God, pls don't shoot me down with lightning for saying this.

anyway, it's camp later! woohooo!! i'm so looking forward to be a camper after being in the organising committee for like 3 yrs straight. it's nice to be a camper at times. just chill and enjoy. so here it goes! gabe, ur games better be fun yah. can't wait to get a tan. pls pls pls let me be burnt. i dn mind. never had a sun burn in my life anyway.

oh so update on the europe trip. wah calling all peeps who wanna go to europe in say 2006/7? still quite tentative abt the date. wensi wants to do it with her exchange in smu, which is after i graduate. meaning i'm already working. so kind of tricky how i can take 1mth leave. it was a tossup between US and europe for xiao, but i'm so bent on europe. so ended up persuading her to take her europe exchange. so anyone wanna come along? shoestring budget trip. so chill abt the cash. i'm ultra broke too. saving up in bits, but it seems such a long way to go.

i just had to blog this. I'VE GOT MY HAVIANAS!!!! and it's a cool gold. can anyone beat tt? never imagine tt i'd wear sth like this. it's was a bday present frm two dearies: ROU AND VIEN! *MUACK MUACK* yeah so there was this little funny episode when rou came along with the slippers saying "princess, here's your golden slippers" boy, guess it was meant as a joke and we just tried for fun. hahha, it turned out to be the nicest pair there. yay!!! but i must say it's a tad expensive. kind of frivolous spending. so thanks a lot girls! i know it ain't cheap. feel kinda bad too.

met the crescent girls yest, so today i'm gonna meet my nj bunch. wensi, i'm coming soon! i won't be late. will leave after i blog this. see you raisin!

a bit of publicity: my youth camp's gonna be in sentosa frm 2-5dec. hey if you think zoukout's too cheesy and overly publicized, come for the camp! it'll be a head-banging time. a clean fun type of head-banging of course. we're leaving church on thurs at 1pm. so drop me a msg if you wanna come k? i'm going!

being disconnected frm the world is bad. my comp has been in and out of the house and it's terribly irritating for me. have to specially come to school to use the net. pathetic state. had in mind things to blog abt but i'll just skip them again. grr..

neville tan was fabulous! solid message man! too bad, he had to speak to the sermon topic. i would really wanna hear abt his life. it'll beat reading the book. oh btw, you guys should buy it. even if you're not a believer, it's a great read.

it's really funny how the same topic of marriage came up like 3 times during a week. funny how it came up when hello, i'm still in the club. hahha.. but funny lah. it's sucha distant idea. first we talked abt it during bible study, then again with pastor CH and i forgot how the 3rd time came about. it was funny hearing frm among my friends what we hope to see in the ideal other half. only have a vague idea of what i'm looking for. but eh, shan't say more. it's weird hearing this from me anyway. but for the records, i hope i don't hav the gift of celibacy. sounds so cheapening, but it's the truth. chor ing is also so worried abt tt gift. hahah... high five girl!

scarry how genesis says that the female should submit wholeheartedly to the man. i'm stubborn, so submission is a great struggle for me. i asked xian (during our bs) how can a female submit to a guy when he's a whimp? or a wo1 nang4? the unanimous reply frm all of them was, oh then do you think tt chap will even be in your choice list? hmm yah, it's true. so poor guys, you better be good. i can guarantee tt all girls will want the other half to be more superior. and with girls getting more power, it's tough to be a guy. luckily i'm not one. back to submission. gosh, what a difficult concept to grasp. seriously, end of the day we'll all submit and be tt xiao1 nu2 ren2. oh man, so difficult. nevermind, not for me a the moment.

take it easy and enjoy life first. i'm off now... buzz!

this is such an exciting day for me. first i sprained my right ankle again. think it'll go totally loose by now. everytime also kena the same ankle. how i sprained it? i was merely playing a harmless game of lazy badminton with my bros. then i didn't realise that the floor was uneven. and silly me fell and twisted my ankle. never in my life had i experienced such searing pain in my ankle. the worst sprain ever. i just jumped on my left leg, wincing and whining in pain. for a moment, i just blacked out and sat down. unable to maintain my balance in my head, it was spinning. gosh i was a wreck at tt point. sat there and tried to calm my heart as i was recovering frm the darn pain. that was my pitiful ankle in the early afternoon.

went home after badminton hoping to rest before heading for the chinese guy to rub my ankle. better not let it go untreated after i sprained it the last time. after resting and thinking of going out to the medical hall near my place, my bro screamed that he saw black smoke coming from our window. thought he was talking rubbish again so i just went to see for fun. oh boy, i've never seen black smoke billowing frm my windows before! it was black!! panicked for a moment before regaining my composure and asking everyone to get outta the house. i thot the house below us was on fire! wow, the whole lobby outside my house was smoky and we walked down the stairs (remember tt i sprained my ankle and i live on the damnned 15th and highest floor of my block!) ok so nevermind, limp down and saw my neighbours. the stairway was like a collection centre for all neighbours.

frm 15 i managed to tahan my pain all the way to the 5th floor. it got smokier, darker and way hotter. the stairway railings were hot to the touch. and by the time i got to 5th floor, i was coughing like mad. choking on the smoke. and the police screamed at us to all go back up. dammit! the thought of going back up was both for my life and tearing my ankle. but whatever, just bite my teeth and walk up! guess i was so scared and cldn't really remember the pain.

the whole thing took like the whole afternoon. the 4th floor of my blocked was seared to bits. everything was black. we all stank of smoke and our homes were smoky. like what you smell when you stand near to a heavy smoker. gross.. end of the day, i didn't get to see the chinese physician. had to meet my friend at jurong pt. the lift was stripped of the electricity. so darn it, how can i ever walk down 15 floors and back up again? thank God man, the electricity was back on just before i left home. so i took the lift wearily down and i saw the 4th floor lobby that was all tar black. it's blacker than a blangah. wah..

guess what dad said was rite. to pray and thank God that He preserved our lives. that the fire didn't occur near our floor, or we'd have to escape to the rooftop. it's this kind of brushes with real accidents that make you realise that what you see on news of burns that scare you. ok i wasn't really scared cuz the fire engine came like real fast. but i can't imagine if i lived near those levels. lesson of the day: now your drills in case of any emergency and never dump unnecessary furniture along the corridor that can catch fire. think of the possible consequences to yourself and neighbours. life's fragile. thank goodness no one was hurt (maybe some were sent to hospital for checks for inhalation of smoke)

my comp's down and it's darn irritating. it's like i'm disconnected frm the world. cant access my email, cant chat. urgh. and i've gotta come to sch to use it. darn.. had so many things to blog. guess i'll give it a miss then. bleah.

everyday's passing so quickly. the hols seem to be zooming past me and it's horrid. it's nice not to hav anything to do (apart frm stella's stuff) but so far it's nice and relaxed. so i'm waiting for next week to watch incredibles and go for camp! maybe i shld snip my hair b4 the camp. it'll be so hot at sentosa all day man. hope it's sunny and not rainy. or cloudy. i've got not much affinity with the sun tho. rain rain go away....

went for baptism class yesterdy. argh i didn't know that transferees are also required to share their testimonies. strange how come jason got away with it. ah, and we're gonna be scheduled to share em infront of the entire congregation soon! shucks.. i'll probably cower behind my testimonial and read everything verbatim. groan... pastor cheng huat didn't give me chance when i asked him if i also need to share. he just smile and said "why not? you have to share" that's the judgement. bless me God, how to speak in front of those old uncles and aunties who have already watched me grow up man?

some new word i picked up during class. koinonia=sth to do with relating to people around you. fellowship i guess. but doesn't it really ring a bell with nokia? maybe that's where their tagline connecting people came from. interesting. so koinonia sounds like koi (a jap fish) nokia! ok this is quite lame but i thot it was funny. i better stop lest i blaspheme the word of God and kena struck dead when i go out. hahah, what i always tell shiwei when she starts talking cock.

shucks, i haven't preped for bible study later on. hope my girls aren't reading this entry, or they'll stab me. haha. cute bunch of girls. they're so eager to have bs after exams that i feel so guilty for not starting it earlier becuz of exams. sorry dearies. we'll hang out later on. ok i better go now and prep the study on parables. it's interesting so you guys shld do it too.

oh this is a major announcement: neivelle (however you spell his funny name. maybe i shld ask weiliang since it was his icq nick) tan aka the iron man is coming to my church on 28nov! hey i'm opening this invitation to everyone. so yeah, drop me a msg. this is super duper cool guy who was like singapore's most wanted criminal at the age of 15 i think. got thrown into jail a couple of times before he was converted in the prison cell. read his book. it's super short but a gd read. chock, coming?? anyway it's rare that we get to hear him speak, so just come along lah. i'll ask ryan and qinlei as well. so anyway for the rest, do think abt it and come k!

i really can't wait for the hols to really start. though i've kinda given myself an unofficial break since wed. it's so tempting to just chill and relax all the way since it's a public holiday weekend. and yeah i'm so weak in my flesh. i succumb to these temptations easily. so here i am, waiting eagerly for the hols, my mind's not even on com law. bad sign cuz my law is in shambles.

and there's the champion! oh gosh, i haven't really watched much of it. and it's ending! my goodness, why does it have to end b4 the exams??? ok nvm, actually i'm juz envious of their tanned skin. maybe it's time to go sentosa. anyone?? can we play beach volley? i'm not good at it, but it's an easy way to get tan and have fun. hahah apart from swimming.

it's been a great week slacking. maybe a tad too much cuz i'm so hooked on slacking tt i can't bear the idea of hitting the books again. and it's company law, which equates to lotsa reading of absolutely long sentences that never seem to end. when you reach some rare comma, you've long forgotten what's the last phrase you juz read. kudos to all practicing and budding lawyers-t0-be (like yam yam).

great message from bernard lee (navigators chap) in church yesterday. same topic on worship, but he really captured the true essences of worship. nice! so ministered by it. at the same time, it sounded like God was picking on my little dark parts and illuminating it for me to see and feel sorry about it.

the whole duty of man in Ecclesiastes 12:13-14
Fear God and keep His commandments, for this is the whole duty of man. For God will bring every work into judgement, including every secret thing. Whether it is good or whether it is evil.

this is so cool! my friend's getting pregnant! hahah both herself n her husband are estatic. and so are we! this will be the 2nd baby arrival. hahha maybe it'll be nice to hav a girl since amy ong already had axios. so a girl frm amy chan would be nice! heh heh..

oh but it also means we can't go to her place so often anymore. the mommy needs some rest. bleah. but hey it's cool to see ur friends hav their kids. hahah little monsters but angels when they are happy.

when i saw her sms, i read the text again n again, thinking tt i could hav misread it. how can it be so coincidental? among's axios was juz a month old like juz a blink of an eye ago, and here we hav the second couple (who got married in the same year as amy and aurelius) having theirs as well. hahaha how funny it can be. exciting.. finally, the mpv in the tan's house will be put to use. instead of ferrying all the oldies like nat and xian. hahah ops nat, time to stick to your own little red car.

so happy (their dog) will be kinda overlooked i guess. now tt the grandparents will be cooing over the baby to come. xian, think it's going to be ur job to look after happy. anyway she loves you. so you can carry on buying those meat sticks for her. hahha..

gosh, this is going to be a terrible wk. huge premonition about tt. yest's paper was horrid, i had nothing to write for those heavy weight questions. today's worse. i woke up with a sty (however you spell it) in my eye! oh my goodness... my eyes are really the weaklings. they either get infected with bacteria or somethings juz happen to em. gosh! so now, here i am wearing my nerdy specs. probably stuck with them for the next two papers. yuck! anyway, i'm praying it miraculously disappears overnite. not asking too much by saying it be well by this afternoon. but argh, get lost you irritating little thing in my eye! i can't blink normally. bleah.. i'm going to visit my beloved doc in sch later on. by now, my record card probably only shows visits regarding this silly pathetic girl's eyes. i'm their record holder for buying most eye drops. bless me..